Again we’re offering the prize – a DVD of the correct answer – to the winner of this week’s competition. Simon

Here’s an unusual entry for TFAD. It’s not something I’ve written recently, but rather something I wrote four years ago, during the last FIFA World Cup. What interests me as I re-read it now is that, save for notes of memorial for Alan Ball and Sir Bobby Robson, the only thing that would be different about this description were I writing it today is that the phrase  ‘in the second half against Sweden’ would read instead ‘in both halves against the USA’. (NB My description was of the shorter version of the commercial, which was the first to be screened. The full version embedded here is superior.)

The best thing I have seen on television this year is an advert for Carlsberg lager, which has, since I was a boy, sold itself with the slogan ‘Probably the best lager in the world’. It’s less an advert than a short film, and funnier than any comedy sketch in recent memory.

It is an overcast morning, and we see a dozen or so middle-aged men climbing into the back of a white van. We realise they are all former greats of English football – Sir Bobby and Jack Charlton, Bryan Robson, Stuart Pearce – and watch as the van pulls away.

‘Who are we playing today?’ asks Alan Ball.

‘The Dog and Duck,’ says Peter Shilton.

‘Right,’ says Ball. ‘I’ll mark the dog.’

We cut to a dingy changing room where Bobby Robson gives a stirring team talk. Outside on an uneven football pitch an amateur team, some of its members balding and overweight, look aghast as the erstwhile internationals sprint towards them. A game begins. Tackles fly in from Peter Reid and Terry Butcher, and goals from Peter Beardsley and Chris Waddle. The opposition is soundly trounced, and traipses from the field. Finally, we see the aging All Stars sitting at a bar, each of them enjoying a lager. ‘Carlsberg don’t do pub teams,’ says a voiceover. ‘But if they did, they’d probably be the best pub team in the world.’

There are two conclusions to draw. The first is that the prediction, fashionable among film critics a few years ago, that one day the best new filmmaking talent would opt for lucrative careers in advertising, instead of uncertain ones in the film industry, could well have come true. The second is that, were England to perform as they did in the second half against Sweden, the Carlsberg pub team would play them off the park.

It’s not often that an artist will admit to someone else doing their work better than they do. But so spectacular is Ryan Adams’s take on the Oasis’s famous song ‘Wonderwall’ that Noel Gallagher, erstwhile mastermind of the bad, even commented on it in an interview with SPIN Magazine: ‘I think Ryan Adams is the only person who ever got that song right. I’d love to do the Ryan Adams version, but in front of 60 000 Oasis fans that wouldn’t be possible.’

Adams’s work merits such acknowledgement. He accepted the challenge of being an American artist attempting to sing a piece written and recorded by a quintessentially British band; moreover, the vocals on ‘Wonderwall’ have a distinctive sound I would imagine is difficult to mimic. Even with seemingly poor odds of success, Adams takes a completely different approach to ‘Wonderwall’ and gives the song the emotion that it lacked in the original.  In my opinion, his stylistic choices are much more fitting for the lyrics. Adams’ version of the song allows the words to stand out for their true beauty:

Because maybe

You’re gonna be the one that saves me

And after all

You’re my wonderwall

This is not in any way meant to bash Oasis’s original version – the song is one of my favorites for a good reason.  The lyrics are so brilliant that they would sound great with many different kinds of music.  I think it appropriate, though, to share Ryan Adams’s cover version with others.  Perhaps those who love the original version will appreciate Adams’s version; perhaps those who never enjoyed the original may appreciate this different presentation of the song; and perhaps others might find this an atrociously disrespectful piece that isn’t even comparable to the Oasis track.  Regardless of what the reaction of some listeners may be, this cover version deserves to be heard: it tops my list of cover songs.

If you’re interested in learning a bit more about Adams, you should hear some of his music. He does more than just cover songs: he writes his own pieces, filling his songs with alternative country-rock sounds and masterful lyrics.  Adams has matured and softened over his years as a musician: his first few albums were full of angst, with album titles like ‘Heartbreaker’ and ‘Love Is Hell’.  (For a great sample of his earlier music, listen to ‘Come Pick Me Up’.) Recently he’s steered away from such heartache, and has started recording with a new band, The Cardinals. I’m still exploring his newer sound, but anticipate that it’ll be as pleasant as his earlier solo recordings. However, I always expect his ‘Wonderwall’ cover to be one of the highlights of Adams’s career.

The remake of ‘The Karate Kid‘ opened to massive box office success this weekend, but whatever happened to the original ‘Karate Kid,’ Ralph Macchio?

He’s not been in a movie anyone’s seen since ‘My Cousin Vinny’ but, if this mockumentary trailer is to believed, Macchio’s not landing the big parts because he’s just too normal and is happy living off his ‘Karate Kid’ residuals. But, after an intervention by loved ones, Macchio summons the determination and courage that brought Daniel Larusso glory on the dojo mat, and redirects it to the task of sullying his nice-guy reputation with drugs and hookers in order to stage a Robert Downey Jr.–  or Mickey Rourke–style comeback. It’s LOL funny!

Now, what’s  Macaulay Culkin up to?

The Word Cup kicks off today and I’m SOOOOOOO  excited. It’s all about football, music and marketing – and so, here’s my favourite, goal, song and advert. I’d love to know what the TFAD community thinks.

I know it’s against England –  but who cares? This Maradona goal from Mexico ‘86 is in a ‘different class’ Goaaal!!

New Order from Italia ‘90: ‘World in Motion’ has to be the best World Cup song ever. Camden boy John Barnes rapping “Cos’ I’m the England man” brings back great memories for me: of a summer of love, raves and football. And we came so close!

This Nike ad of the Brazilian team in the airport from France ‘98 is unarguably the best World Cup ad, and the Tamba Trio’s version of ‘Mas Que Nada‘ is a pure delight.

To celebrate ‘Fela’s’ up and coming triumph at the Tonys, I have dug up and old album choice of Clive’s, I’m sure he won’t mind. Simon

His style is so laid-back he makes Charlie Watts look like the mad percussionist from The Muppets. The Afro-beat veteran, Fela Kuti’s right-hand man, hits the beat on the title track from his new album. Highly recommended.

This time last year, I was lucky enough to be in NYC attending the Tony Awards; I cheered to the rafters as ‘Billy Elliot the Musical’ walked away with a record-breaking ten Tonys, including the biggie: Best Musical. This year it’s the turn of ‘Fela!’, the musical celebrating the life of Afrobeat legend Fela Kuti, to be nominated for (a ‘Billy Elliot’-equalling) 11 Tonys, including Best Musical.

To celebrate this magnificent achievement, the show has just released its original cast recording (which includes the cast’s version of ‘Zombie’, the infamous 1977 protest song that sparked the Nigerian army’s deadly attack on Kuti’s Kalakuta Republic commune). I haven’t seen ‘Fela!’, but my wife saw it off Broadway and raved about it to me from her mobile in the taxi back to her hotel; I couldn’t shut her up. Jay-Z and Will Smith were equally captivated by the show, so much so that they signed on as producers and helped move it onto Broadway proper, where it has been playing to packed houses and rave reviews ever since.

I’m a big fan of African music, and 70s Western African music in particular. I grew up in Ghana and Nigeria in the 70s, and Ghanaian Highlife and Nigerian Afrobeat have been coursing through my veins ever since – so I’ve naturally been desperate to see ‘Fela!’ since my wife came back from NYC full of such joy and enthusiasm for it. Great news: my wait in nearly over. The National Theatre has confirmed that the show will be coming to London in November (I just got my ticket) and, as the expression goes, you should beg, borrow or steal a ticket. I have no doubt it is going to be the theatrical experience of the year.

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The original version of Zombie

Update: If you’re interested in Fela Kuti, this Radio 3 documentary is well worth a listen.

Update: ‘Fela’ was robbed at the Tonys.

Paul from tape to tape, just wouldn’t let it lie, but I have to say he’s picked some corkers- Simon

Hip hop battle have been an intrinsic part of its culture since the mid 1970’s so in true hip hop style I felt ! had to challenge Simon’s and Marc’s slightly dubious selection of the best hip hop tracks of all time. Let the battle continue !!

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The Incredible Bongo Band : Apache
The original b boy anthem using the Shadows Apache sample with the infamous amen break to devastating effect

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Black Sheep : The Choice is Yours
A highly acclaimed and alternative hip hop group ,Black Sheep drop one of the sweetest intro’s in hip hop

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Public Enemy : Bring the Noise
Balancing political incisiveness with punk attitude, Public Enemy just made all other hip hop groups sound tame.

Big Daddy Kane : Set it Off
Showing us how rapid fire delivery should be done Big Daddy Kane never skipped a beat .

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The Pharycde : Passing Me By
More left of centre than de la Soul, Pharycde provide us with one of the most used samples in hip hop.

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Notorious B.I.G. : Hypnotise
Needs no introduction, still causes mayhem on today’s dancefloors.

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Warren G : Regulate
Michael Macdonald never sounded so good. A true G funk anthem.

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N.W.A : Straight Outta Compton
Still sounds as confrontational as it did when released in the early 90s it also had an amazing video showing us early glimpses of Dre and Cube.

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Dr Dre : Still Dre
Dre always pushed hip hop forward and this is my favourite Dre track ever!

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Africa Bambatta :Planet Rock
Using kKraftwerks Trans European Express and Babe Ruth’s the Mexican samples this crossed the early electro /hip hop divide .

I don’t watch much television. Mainly since I’ve invested in a Sky Box, it means I can never get on the damn thing for son number 1 watching non-stop sport, son number 2 watching Nickelodeon and the wife watching ‘Project Runway’ (no, not about Heathrow’s fifth runway). I’m lucky if I gain access by 11pm when all else have retired for the night. Still, these are not your problems really.

Two series I ensure I do get to watch, are ‘Doctor Who’ and ‘Ashes To Ashes’. I also took a punt on the new Detective series ‘Luther’ with Idris Elba, that bloke out of ‘The Wire’. And I kind of wished I hadn’t bothered to crack the whip and kick various family members out of the screening room (a.k.a our lounge) for any of them.

The problem in all three are the scripts. They just don’t seem to hold together at all.’ Ashes To Ashes‘ had long tranches of time when the characters held deep and meaningfuls (which themselves never went anywhere), while the case under investigation receded into the background, until somebody remembered there was a murderer on the loose, or it was time for Gene to go beat up the suspect in the holding cells once again. Doctor Who was even worse, with the monster not exactly beating down the door but rather filing its nails, until Amy & the Doc had finished some school 4^th Form metaphysical musings. I like Luther, I really like his psycho stalker (played by the spellbinding Ruth Wilson) and the fact that they are having a sort of remote relationship; but in last week’s episode Luther arranged a meeting with her that didn’t seem to be relevant to the race against time kidnap case he had, served only to rehash the confused boundaries of their relationship as had already been established, while those squandered minutes might just have ended up costing the life of his ex-wife.

If you need to have discursions from the plot, they have to be embedded much better rather than a ‘stop the action, I want to spout off’ interlude. They ought to emerge organically, not seem bolted on. Okay that’s an analysis with my writer’s hat on. Even as a viewer I always had trouble with this. In Terminator 2 for example, the most technologically advanced cyborg assassin the T-1000, was forever off-screen allowing Arnie and Sarah Connor to put the world to rights through the power of heated debate. What the hell was it busy doing? It had no need of the running repairs to shotgun wounds that T-1’s cyborg had need of. It was liquid metal for flipssakes! It didn’t require food and water stops. It didn’t have a gambling habit that needed attending to at either the bookies or Gamblers Anonymous meetings. So I say again, what was the baddie doing while the goodies were hitting the open road? Finding out where they were heading to, you might offer. How? They were travelling randomly. Maybe T-1000 had a slow wi-fi connection in his head?

So script writers, if you set up a storyline which is supposed to lead the audience through with pace and suspense, then you might have to come up with more subtle ways of communicating the deep and meaningful moments between the lead characters. “But before I kill you Mr Bond, I’m going to dazzle you with the details of my secret plans for world domination”…

Over on The Coffee House, Alex Massie says ‘Beat This, Adidas’ of the Nike Word Cup ad. Well, I think anyone who gives Snoop Dogg a light sabre and has Daft Punk chatting to Hans Solo, just did!